I suck at blog upkeep

Hi friends. it's been awhile, huh? Sorry about that. I've written about 7 posts that I deemed too boring or angry to post (one involved a reference to spelunking and Carmen Sandiego, so ya know, your loss). Turns out it's really hard to be interesting and pleasant when you are me. I still don't necessarily have anything of interest to talk about, so I'll just provide a brief recap of what you've missed if you haven't talked to me in the last 6 months:

* My life changed since we last spoke. Forget my new job, my new work out regime, the new "not going out 7 nights a week" lifestyle thing I'm trying. No, all of those things are minor compared to what really changed me last Friday night. And that my friends, was the NKOTBSB concert. For those not familiar with NKOTBSB, first of all... go on and get yourself a life and please stop reading now. For those in the know, let me repeat... I WENT TO SEE A CONCERT THAT COMBINED THE GREATEST BAND OF MY ELEMENTARY SCHOOL DAYS AND THE GREATEST BAND OF MY HIGH SCHOOL DAYS: NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK AND BACKSTREET BOYS (and yes, I said high school. I liked backstreet boys in highschool, yet still felt that I had any right to make fun of other people). I don't think its a stretch to say this experience was earth shattering. At one point (when I realized that they gave all of Joey's solos to Jordan cause Joey went through puberty since we last saw him and no longer has the highest voice of the group) my head almost exploded. Ya see, contrary to what my sister thinks.. I was, and always will be, the biggest Jordan fan you have ever seen. I even stuck with him through the low point when he was a disaster on "the surreal life" trying to hook up with some ex-American idol reject and sharing a room with Joey Gladstone and Mr. Woodchuck.. (did somebody say.... wood?) And even though he doesnt have that sexy braided rattail anymore, he still is a smoking hot piece of man candy. And although I could have died a happy woman from just seeing Jordan come out on stage in LEATHERS, they took it a step further and performed a "battle" of "Backstreet's back" and "Hanging tough" for their finale. swoon.

* My roomate is obsessed with the Casey Anthony trial. As in, watches live feeds from the courtroom all day long and last night said (and I quote) "the trial adjourned early today cause that bitch Casey got sick". I found out this morning that Casey Anthony is actually from Warren, Ohio. I haven't told Meghan yet as I don't want her to spontaneously combust with the knowledge that we all share a home state. Hoping telling her via blog softens the blow.

*Apparently Saved by the Bell is no longer airing every morning at 7 and 7:30. First Meredith Viera and now this? I have no reason to wake up anymore.

* I am re-infatuated with the Real World (ie. RW/RR Challenge farm league) after the last season in Las Vegas. To say it was amazing would be a gross understatement. On the reunion special last night, we found out that one of the roomates is now designing his own clothing line. Basically he got a stencil and is screenprinting his name on shirts, hats, and underwear and calling himself creative director. It's ridiculous, it's ugly, and it will soon be in my closet. (which isnt saying much since I am the same person who bought a "Landon wall calendar", with a different Landon pose for every month of the year!)

* And finally, the news of a lifetime. Mr. Barry Manilow -the man, the myth the legend- is doing a series of concerts with the Youngstown Symphony this summer. Meaning Youngstown, Ohio. And even better than that, he is performing IN youngstown for one of the shows. And EVEN BETTER than that, it is on AUGUST 27th. Which happens to be his biggest fan's birthday. If there is a better way to ring in 28, I don't know it.

Ups and downs

Man I felt like a loser this weekend.

On Friday night, I got so excited about a scavenger hunt that my friend Carrie had put together for us to play between bars, that I almost threw up running to find the clue. (literally, I had to go home early cause I almost vomited).

Saturday night we went out to “da club” and man did I feel out of place. First of all, I was wearing a t-shirt and flats. Woops. Secondly, there were at least three occasions when my roommate and I looked at each other to say “does katy perry sing this song??” (incidentally, the answer was ‘no’ all three times, and one time the singer in question was actually Chris Brown). It was one of those one-word bars that all seem exactly the same like “play” or “five” or “fly”. I didn’t bother getting the exact name until the next morning when I realized I lost my ID and had to email the general manager to see if anyone “turned it in”. (I still haven’t received my answer, rich@midtowndc.com) (And for those of you keeping track at home,yes, I have lost my ID and phone in the course of 4 days)

Then on Sunday, as if to cement my loser-ness, I decided to watch the Grammys. As I watched the red carpet, I realized I didn’t know 90% of the nominees or performers. I thought that Bruno Mars was someone from Menudo. I still have no idea who this “Drake” fellow is. And to top it off, I had to text my sister to ask if Willow Smith is a boy or a girl (by the way, that answer is still TBD, so any input would be appreciated).

But things are looking up.

It’s a balmy 60 degrees in DC today which makes me want to run down M St topless. Its valentines day which means there is a ridiculous amount of pink cupcakes at work today (and I always say themed-calories are the best kind of calories). And 90210 is on tonight and things have really been heating up recently between Mr. Matthews and Aunt Becky.

So to summarize:

Bad: vomiting from excitement over a SCAVENGER HUNT, left license at one-named club, 27 year old making Menudo references

Good: topless weather, calories and lori loughlin

Phone Dramz, lol, ttfn

There are certain phrases you never think you will get the pleasure of texting to someone. One of those phrases is “did a crazy foreign man call you from my phone today?”. Well friends, yesterday I had the pleasure of doing just that. And man oh man, did it ever feel good.

Let’s take a step back. Rewind three days to Monday when things weren’t really going my way. For one, I had the stomach flu. I spent a good deal of my day dry heaving, excusing myself from meetings for fear of barfing on my coworkers, and eventually laying on the couch at home in pain. This trend continued through Wednesday, and I wasn’t in the best place. I woke up Thursday morning all jacked up for my weekly trip to Philly, salivating at the idea of being motion sick in a cab, train or rental car for over 6 hours of the day, and sitting through 7 hours of meetings. Everything was sure coming up roses.

But then everything changed. Something magical happened. I got on the train to Philly and quickly realized my cell phone was missing. To some, this might have been a bad thing, but I didn’t care much. Walk with me while I explain my phone situation, will you?... My phone is from 1984. It has a slide-out keyboard popular about 10 years ago with tweens, and is called a “Rumor 2”. There is also a large permanent decal on the back proclaiming “RUMOR 2”!! on it in case there was any doubt that LG’s target market with this particular product was 12-16 years old justin beiber fan (well, i guess they got me half right). In short, I love my phone, but considering it probably is worth about $10, it wasn’t such a big loss.

I considered my phone a lost cause and just chalked it up to something else ive lost in a cab (other things i have lost in a cab: lip gloss, credit card, half a slice of pizza, self-worth, dignity), but I was talked into at least calling it to see if anyone answered. And dear lord, did someone ever answer. The convo went a little something like this:

Cab Driver: “HELLLOOWOWWOO?!”

Me: (laughing hysterically) “um, do you have my cell phone?”

Cab Driver: “YES! CELL PHONE! HELLO!”

Me: “wow, ok. How do I get it?”

Cab Driver: "YEs!!!"

Some more conversation transpired and I got the message that he was bringing it back to envirocab “headquarters” (which I later came to found out is a scary unmarked dark room on Columbia Pike)

Fast forward to hours later when I go pick up my phone at “HQ” and look through my calls. The cab driver called... My mother. at noon on a Thursday. After I had already talked to him and made plans to get my phone myself. Apparently he wanted to call my mom to scream “YES YES YES” into the phone at her, which she thought was “JESS JESS JESS” and subsequently thought I had gotten abducted.

He then called back everyone who texted me during the day. Thank you for that, sir.

It was strange. It was confusing. It was glorious.

And thank god I have my precious phone back in my possession so I don't have to go buy one of those "smart phones" all the kids are talking about.

In other news:

Yesterday I didn’t have any change when I parked on the street and had to feed the meter, but what I DID have was a piece of paper and a pen. So I got resourceful and wrote “BROKEN METER” on a piece of paper and stuck it on my windshield. Viola. Dishonest? Certainly. But it sure did the trick.